Do you ever feel like you want to start over? Throw everything out and begin again? That's where I'm at these days. It makes me feel like I'm going to get left behind, like it's all a big race and I'm hardly on the starting blocks. And look at the time damn it! So much time, already gone.
Everything I've done so far, artwise, seems terribly polite. And that's not really me. I'm kind of a tell it like it is girl. (Yes, I know you can't tell that from this space.) And yes, I do want to say look at all the beauty in the world. And yes, there is some value in standing around with your camera taking pictures of blossom trees. But it's not really enough for me. For so many years I've had big paintings in my mind. Images dripping in black paint, my words crowding in wherever they can find a space. None of it neat. None of it trying to be beautiful. Just un-apologetically itself.
I can't 'draw' well and I can't 'paint'. But I can be honest about what's really inside me, in the moments I dare to take a peek. You may start to see some terrible crappy 'art' here in the near future. I hope like hell you do!
